FAIL

So yeah . . . that whole project 366 thing ended up being a big FAIL as did my blogging more frequently.  Ugh.  I don't know why.  Well, I know why the picture thing failed, but I'm not sure why the blogging part has failed.  I visit Blogger everyday to read blogs and I think most days I think about updating my own blog, but I can't think of anything worth writing about . . . Or I do think about something worth writing about while I'm in the shower or busy cooking (yeah ok, you caught me, I have only cooked one time since I wrote that last post) or chasing a toddler and then when I have time it seems like too much work to sit down and actually write about whatever it was that was interesting or I forget about it.  I realize that was the worst run on sentence ever and I'm sorry grammar police.

There has not been much going on here lately.  My day typically goes something like this: wake up, feed toddler, drink coffee, play with toddler, try to get myself looking presentable while toddler is watching tv (he is only allowed to watch 1, maybe 2 episodes of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse/day and he usually ends up in the bathroom making it very difficult for me to look presentable while keeping him out of trouble), run errands or play some more, offer toddler lunch which he usually refuses, put toddler down for nap and enjoy some peace and quiet for a few hours, feed toddler dinner, spend time with family, eat dinner, spend time with husband, sleep and repeat.  Not very interesting.  I have been looking for a job, but there are not many jobs out there.  I could probably get a job if I wanted to work full time, but I do not.  It would probably help if I had already taken the test required for licensure and had a full license instead of temporary one . . . procrastination is not helping me.

Hmmm, yeah that's about it for what's going on with me.  Stephen is growing up way too fast.  I feel like his language expands daily.  I was also telling Trevor over the weekend how I feel like Stephen is at a really good age and really fun right now.  Stephen had to prove to me otherwise today by throwing a tantrum about every.little.thing.  He went down for his nap early today because I was sick of the tantrums.  He didn't really seem to care as he usually plays in his crib for like 1/2 hour before sleeping anyway.  That is also something new, he has to take as many toys as he can carry to bed with him.  Sometimes it's his 5 Sesame Street action figures, sometimes it's his 4 Mickey Mouse action figures and others it's as many Little People Little Wheelies cars as he can carry (usually about 4).

Oh and as for Project 366, that failed because I would forget to take a picture of something until I was in bed or getting ready for bed and then it felt too contrived.  I thought about taking a bunch of pictures one day and just saying I took them different days, but that felt wrong too.  So after a couple days it just didn't work out.  I had high hopes, but kind of figured it would end this way.  Maybe I'll upload the pictures I did take and put them in another post.

I would promise to write more, but we know those promises are empty, haha.  I do enjoy writing, I just forget that I do until I actually do it.  Let's hope I don't forget that I do this time and that I actually update tomorrow.

Project 366

I'm sure many of you have seen other people doing this.  I have decided to give it a try.  Looking back over the holidays, I am disappointed in the lack of pictures I took.  I think it will be interesting to see all the pictures at the end of the year and have documentation of each day.  I'm jumping on this bandwagon a little late, but fortunately I did take a picture today.  I think I will try to post pictures here every few days and probably even create a Facebook album so if you're interested (and we're friends on Facebook), you can look there as well.  It would be cool if others that are following me and are doing this themselves would let me know so we could link up.

I will try to post more about life tomorrow or Tuesday.  Hopefully this increases the number of blog posts I do/week.  Oh!  And if you're wondering why it says Project 366 and not 365 it's because this is a leap year.  So I will have to take an extra picture!

Stephen's first "self" portrait. Ha!  I was trying to take a picture of him in a sweatshirt my sister bought him with my phone and he was more interested in seeing the screen.  I tricked him by using the front facing camera instead!  Not the greatest picture, but a picture none-the-less.

Wordless Wednesday

Christmas with a Toddler

Working Mom vs Stay at Home Mom

Today is one of those days where I wonder if I'm really cut out for being a stay at home mom.  I am really thinking working full time is sounding pretty good right now.  I know it's probably just one of those days that is difficult and tomorrow (when I actually go to work) I will feel differently.

I am constantly having this war within myself where I'm fighting between working and staying at home.  I love what I do and sometimes wish I could do it all the time.  But then most days when I'm home with Stephen I love it.  So I'm constantly battling between my passion for my work and my passion for my son.

Today I have found myself bored and antsy just sitting in the living room while Stephen plays.  I can't use the computer while he is awake because he either walks over and hits random keys and then hit the power button turning it off or he closes the laptop and insists I look at his fish or train book with him for the 5000th time today.  So most days I drink my coffee and look at books with him while half watching tv, but that's getting old.  I need something more stimulating to do, but I don't know what that is.  If I try to do anything other than watch him play/watch tv, he thwarts it.  I can't even go to the bathroom without him following me in and unrolling the toilet paper or pulling everything out of the cabinets.  I can't get dressed without him following me into my bedroom and playing with things on my nightstand.  It's getting very frustrating.  This lackadaisical life of leisure was fun for a while, but it is quickly wearing off.

Nevermind the frustration that is feeding a toddler and the ever changing nap schedule.  Stephen has rather suddenly decided that his nap is no longer happening at 11:30.  The last 3 days he has cried and played for over an hour when I put him down at his usual 11:30.  Today and yesterday he fell asleep at about 1.  So now my days of spending the morning playing with him then showering and eating some lunch followed by an activity out of the house after his lunch seem to be over.  I guess I will just have to change the routine up a bit. The saying just when you think you have it figured out, it changes, is so true!

And don't even get me started on the tantrums.  I have decided distraction and ignoring it is the only way to go now.  I used to hold him while he cried, but I don't think that was helping matters.  I'm sure next week will be very interesting, too because we have decided the paci goes bye bye on Sunday.  Hopefully, I don't drive myself crazy next week!

This post is awfully ramble-y and doesn't seem very coherent now that I think about it, but this is just what I am thinking today.  I'm sure most stay at home moms and probably working moms fight this battle over work or baby.  It doesn't seem like there is any easy answer.  I just hope things get a little easier soon because it looks like I'm going to be at home for a while.

Back to Blogging . . . Again

I did not intend to take a hiatus from blogging, but there was a lot going on and I just didn't feel like writing.  Now things have calmed down a lot so I feel like I can get back to blogging.  I will give a little update on what has happened since I last wrote.

Trevor interviewed for what seemed like 1000 jobs in both our area and the Twin Cities.  He received an offer for a job in Minneapolis and accepted it.  Another place he liked better in the Twin Cities promised him an offer, but couldn't tell him when they would be able to do it due to some administrative stuff.  So we were moving and that was very stressful.  I quit my job, he quit his job, we told all of our friends and family.  Trevor was supposed to start the new job today.  We met with our realtor last week to go over what needed to be done to our and what we would be able to sell our house for.  We also talked about our options since we know that we can't sell our house for as much as we owe on it.  She suggested a short sale and let us know that if we went that route there would be a possibility of us not being able to own a home for up to 7 years.  That was just not going to work for us.  We have toddler, we plan on having another kid(s) in the future, I wasn't going to live in an apartment for up to 7 years.  So we talked with a bank to see what we could do as far as getting a loan.  They weren't able to give us exact numbers, but said that the minimum amount we'd need would cost us $500/month.  That would be doable, but that was a very optimistic number.  So Trevor called his current employer and asked for his job back.  They were happy to have him back, so we're staying put for now.  It's disappointing, but also a relief.  Moving is a huge headache that I didn't want to deal with right now.

During my little hiatus, my husband also got viral meningitis.  I do not recommend doing that.  He ended up in the hospital for 2 days because of it.  I also had to call 911 at 2 in the morning and send him in an ambulance by himself.  I probably could have woken Stephen up and gone to the hospital, but I wasn't about to wake a sleeping toddler and spend the night with him in the ER.  Not my idea of a good time.  After some morphine, a steroid shot, a lumbar puncture, and some Zofran Trevor was feeling much better and got home just in time for the Packer game.  I am so blessed that I have parents who were willing to drop all of their weekend plans and drive 5 hours to spend the weekend with me.  They were even willing to miss work on Monday if they had to.

So now we're mostly healthy (Stephen and I are just getting over a cold) and not moving to a new state so I have a little more time and a lot less stress.  Plus, as of Friday I am unemployed again.  I feel like my work history lately is not good.  I really hope to find a job I really like (I liked the job I just quit, but not the new director) so that I can stay there for a very long time.  Having kids does things to you, I guess.

Look for a post about homemade Irish Creme and mint chocolate chip cupcakes with 7 minute frosting. Happy Monday!

Another Update

Well, we won't be moving to Seattle.  I have to admit that is a bit of a relief to me.  T had 2 phone interviews with Amazon and then they told him he was no longer being considered.  His friend that worked there said the same thing happened to him and then he actually moved to Seattle and applied again and was hired that time.  So maybe there were some people that were more local that they wouldn't have to pay relocation costs to hire or not.  T was a little disappointed, but I think he wasn't too sure about the whole moving across the county thing either.  I can say that our mothers are very relieved!

T has a few more things in the works though, so moving is still on the table, it just won't be to Seattle or anywhere that far.  T really wants a job that he applied for in Minneapolis.  He had a phone interview with an HR person and then had to do a mini project for them.  He has submitted the project and is just waiting to hear back from them if they would like him to have another interview.  I am really hoping that they do, but we shall see.  They told T he should hear back from them by Tuesday.  T is also going to Denver for an in-person interview next week, but is most likely not going to take that job.  He said he just wanted the interviewing experience, so I guess I can't argue with that.  He's been an interviewing machine.  I just hope that something works out soon!

Other than all the interviewing, there hasn't been a whole lot going on here.  We finally painted the outside of our house and realized just how UGLY our house was before we painted it.  It's kind of amazing.  I almost wish we would've done it sooner.  I'm pretty boring these days, but I'll try to write more this week!

Interview Update

I just wanted to update you all on how interview number one went. T said he thought it went pretty well immediately after and that it wasn't as challenging as he thought it was going to be. He was told that he would hear back in a week if he was going to get another interview. They also said that if he were to get the position, they'd pay to move our stuff out there and our rent for 2 months. So that's pretty nice.

I figured we'd be waiting a while to hear back, but T got an email inviting him to do a second phone interview last night. So the rollercoaster ride continues. T also has a phone interview tomorrow and a couple more in the process of being scheduled.

I'll keep you all updated!

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